march the 21st 2020 coming up to 5pm

i’ve not been out the flat since wednesday afternoon

because sports on forest council have made my life hell

my incompetent housing officer

has basically told everyone i complained because everyone’s putting stuff on the stairwell he didn’t name me but it’s a block of six flats and i’m the only one with stuff outside so it doesn’t take a genius to work out who’s put the complaining and within a half an hour the mad woman from downstairs comes rushing up on my door i’ve got her on camera comes rushing up on my door

and frantically knocks on my door for two minutes i’ve been trying to get someone from the council to contact me

and after almost three days at quarter to six last night i get a secretary emailing me saying we’ve received all your emails from the last three days

oh and they’re investigating but it doesn’t really help that i’ve gone out my mind for three days without any acknowledgement which is bloody rude and poor customer service hello caspy

but no one has actually done anything to make my life less miserable i have no food okay i’ve got frozen mints but i’ve got nothing to cook it with i’ve got no butter no pasta i have been shopping before wednesday and there’s been nothing in the shops for over a week i’ve not been able to get past that i tried online deliveries but they’ve all been captured for three weeks as the zap went down last night or has been taken down the same as most of the other grocery stores

i’ve tried finding stuff on amazon and most of that is sold out

i am all alone here

my counselors have done nothing in fact no that they’ve done less than nothing they eventually got chased by a different walled counselor yesterday bless her karen bellamy she has done a cracking job

but it’s not her job to support me it’s my counselor’s job to support me they’ve been kept in the loop every step of this way for the last three weeks and they have not intervened once until yesterday when karen got in touch with roz who basically did not read the long email that i sent assumed i was panicking about covid19 said we’re all in the same boat and referred me to mental health i’m not worried about the virus it’s a virus it is not going to kill most people i am not worried but i cannot leave my flat and i cannot get any groceries even if i do leave my flat i can’t even go into the shops if they’re crowded twice i’ve been to tesco’s in the last week and i’ve just walked in walked out because it’s been too crowded where do people like me sit when everyone else is panicked by i wouldn’t say it’s panic buying they’re not panic buying at all they’re bulk buying they know what they’re doing they’re not panicking about it i don’t see anyone in tesco’s or sainsbury’s or morrisons panicking they’re angry because they can’t get any more of the stuff they’ve already bought and on one occasion i had someone walk past me in tesco’s monday i think it was picking up something and talking to someone else after we’ve been told to socially isolate she’s walking around tesco’s talking someone saying oh i don’t really need it i’m just getting getting it because it’s here i wasn’t sure what she was buying i didn’t look right she was behind me but if you don’t need it don’t buy it at the moment i’ve got a little bit of milk and a little bit of cereal because i can have porridge for dinner and the boys my cats have got plenty of food plenty of litter i’ve just had a delivery of litter that should last them a couple of weeks

but until the council makes this place safe and makes me feel like they’re looking after me

i really don’t know what i’m going to do

i mean there’s only so much

coffee i can drink that’s all i’ve got coffee and tea i’ve got no milk got sugar but it’s like the first time i went to a food bank two and a bit years ago yeah you get an awful lot of food at a food bank but you can’t make a meal out of any of it

so i’ve still got to go and like i could make lasagna theoretically i’ve got mints i’ve got onions i’ve got pasta sheets i’ve got nothing to do the sauces with i’ve got nothing for sauces

the police have contacted me or tried but because of my anxiety in the heightened anxiety levels i’ve had to enforce stringent blocking of private calls and so the police can’t even contact me i am absolutely on meow the councillors don’t do anything over the weekend because i’ve messaged this karen woman she hasn’t done anything

i’ve tried reaching out to people on messenger and whatsapp and a few dating apps and i’m not getting any responses from any of them the last response i had from someone when i asked to talk to him was i’ll call you back on sunday and that was thursday night block

i don’t wanna talk to people that don’t want to talk to me especially when they give the excuse i’m with my friends thank you that’s really insane so i’m never classed as a friend with anyone because i’m always blocked out whenever anyone’s with their friends so i’m not one of their friends that’s why i’m alone

so i don’t know what i’m going to do

see now i’ve got people outside

and it’s scary because i don’t it’s not safe anyway this block is not secure the capture don’t make sure the doors are shut they know the tenants are leaving the doors open wedging the doors open and they tell me off for trying to get the tenants to close the doors it’s all back to front upside down why am i the one in the wrong when everyone else is doing things that’s unsafe and illegal and yet people telling me oh maybe you should move why maybe they should [ __ ] move

i got evicted no i didn’t get evicted i got moved by barclay dagnam council forcibly because they were making my life hell as well after 48 years because their social services and their housing weren’t doing anything to support me and their repairs because i couldn’t get any repairs done for seven years they just wouldn’t make appointments with me

i don’t know what i’m supposed to this will be going up onto youtube eventually but i might post this to facebook because this is just desperate man

i’ve never been in a situation where i can’t even get out to get some shopping or i’ve never felt like even if i could get out i would get shopping

i mean it’s all right saying go and usually corner shops but if you’re on benefits like me and corner shops are just too expensive to live out of i don’t mind i go there occasionally because i do keep them cool shop you know i go there once a week once a fortnight just to make sure you know they’re there when you need them but you can’t live out of corner shops at their prices

and if people being allowed to buy two or three or four items of things i mean the latest bit out of tesco’s is they’re restricting people down to three items i’m sorry why are they restricting people down to three items why are they still by bulk buying or buying like toilet rows you can still buy nines and 21s of toilet roll sorry 21 packs of toilet roll nine packs of toilet roll when people can’t even get one why aren’t the supermarkets ordering the minimum multiple packs twos and fours so that that would be the ration there should be a consensus amongst this it shouldn’t be like well we’ll bulk but we’ll we’ll take three of whatever the biggest pack is which is what people are doing

and the managers aren’t doing very much bless the tesco manager fantastic grad my way he actually stopped someone taking three packs of four toilet roll about a week ago

but the trouble is it’s all will it’s society’s fault because society over the last 35 years has got into the habit will take what we can get away with no one self enforces the law on themselves anymore there was a day when you know people wouldn’t do more than 70 miles an hour on my way now they’ll do 80 or 90 until they think someone’s gonna be watching you know there’s cameras or road works or something like that and they’ll go as fast as they can as fast as they think they can get away with same with the supermarkets if they allow us three we’ll buy three of the biggest things if they’re not restricting other things will bulk buy we’ll get a trolley load of water for instance what’s that about

this is wrong society was falling apart to begin with and then this virus hits and then you really see the true nature society selfish arrogant and greedy there’s not many out there thinking of others they’re thinking of others that they might be able to make a profit out of them yeah but not thinking about the poor people that can’t get out they’re just worrying about their own little self don’t worry about the money the government’s already said this don’t worry about your house the government’s already said this i don’t know how many times boris johnson says you are not going to be evicted

and then you’ve got all these greedy people over all over facebook why don’t the council stop giving parking tickets why are the parking wardens out sorry this is a virus this is not anarchy there’s still a state of law in this country you’re still supposed to be upright decent seasons theoretically why should you be able to park i mean someone even put on facebook well they even gave me a ticket for parking outside the shop to get a toilet roll why would you drive to get a toilet roll i mean i’m assuming the way they’re describing it is it’s a corner shop so i’m assuming it’s local to them

and even if it isn’t exactly really local i mean why don’t you go to your local corner shop because they’re all fully stocked the ones around here they don’t seem to be running out of anything anytime soon but even if it’s not a local corner shop why not just walk unless you’re disabled which i can understand you would drive everywhere most people are healthy enough to be able to walk so what’s the need for unrestricted parking if we had unrestricted parking that would encourage people to drive more and go out more and socialize more if anything boris should bring in stringent parking wipe out all current parking restrictions and say there is no parking outside at all enforce all parking restrictions as 24 7. regardless of what time there is on the plate those same parking restrictions apply 24 7. anyone found contravening car gets scrapped no ifs and answer buts these people need to learn they cannot do whatever they want to do there’s a society outside their little world and they’re affecting it and if they want to do whatever they want they lose their jobs they lose their house they lose their car there should be no hands ifs but no fairness in this society

if some people can get away with not treating the rest society as fair then no one should be treated fairly and if that means scrapping people’s cars just because they park outside the shop to get some groceries knowing that it’s not legal to park there pick it up and crush it do it in the street make an example out of these people no way we’ve tolerated people breaking the law not just with parking but with blocking the highway putting bins out on roads you know all this sort of petty infringement that people think oh that’s only been neighborly no sorry bins are bins if you want your own bit of road you buy off the council via a dropped curb if you haven’t got enough garden to park your car in your garden and create a driveway move if you want your own parking space move to a place with its own parking space or create one if you can don’t force society to become your storage for your vehicle you buy a vehicle you work out what the storage should be don’t get up in arms just because oh look i can’t park right outside my house i have to walk two feet i don’t care whether it’s two feet or two hundred feet i’ve walked over three quarters of a mile in the past because i’ve got no parking outside my ass you didn’t see me writing away and complaining to the council and putting things on the internet i can’t park outside my ass no i did something about it i wrote to my council and i got parking put in

so don’t sit there whinging all the time i got no parking did you have a car when you moved here did you buy the car while you were here did you take into account that you’ve got a car or you were going to get a car no no no so don’t blame me and the rest society for your lack of foresight if you want somewhere to store something you have to create the storage not assume you can just leave it outside which is basically what people are doing with cars if you buy a mobile phone you don’t leave it on the curb because oh it’s public land it’s free i can store it there if you buy a laptop you don’t leave it outside all your other items you put inside your house on your land at least land that you rent or have a mortgage on the car is the only thing that people have where they assume they can just leave it on public land which is what the highway is not your land even with a dropped curb it’s still not your land and it’s not even your curb thank you you’re paying the council to put a dropped curb in which gives you the right to go up onto your drive in fact it makes a drive the dropped curve without a drop kerb it’s just a garden

but it doesn’t give you the right to restrict anyone parking or using that curb that curb is a public piece of land you’ve just paid to have it modified so you don’t own it it never gets added onto your tenancy or your title deeds of your house it’s a dropped curb which is a public available service it’s for disabled access as well as your access to your garden so unfortunately society has for the last 35 years grown accustomed to being absolutely arrogant about public land it’s about time you woke up and smelled the coffee everyone

you need to work things out for yourself hire a garage park car in a garage if there’s not enough garages around you have to work out when you have a car where you’re going to park it it isn’t a no it’s a no-brainer you know what is so difficult i’ve bought something where am i going to put it you do it with everything else you buy why not your car don’t assume you’re going to get free parking um one person on facebook couple of weeks ago put down well when i moved here there was free parking everywhere now they put zones in and dropped curbs and there’s less parking get over it that’s life things change

you can’t assume you’ve got storage for something if you’re using someone else’s land you can’t turn around and say oh no you can’t change use of this piece of land because it’s outside my house you don’t own the land they can do whatever they want if you’ve got a problem so yeah yourself don’t blame me not my fault you’ve got a car and you can’t find somewhere to park it you are responsible hellotabs you are responsible for your own goods

anyway what else is there what else is happening apart from this is the week of walk 15 miles not to get cat leaders and have to wait three days for an online delivery which came a day late but thankfully they’ve all got food and they’ve all got litter the cats

and i’m just waiting for my food to run out basically

i think i’ll give up and say doesn’t do me any favors

the only thing i can hope for is that this current virus will kill off all the arrogant nasty bad people first but there’s very little chance of that happening if only society could be cleansed of these people and then i wouldn’t have any neighbors because they’d all go as well

anyway i’ve got my x-files i’ve got my cats they’ve got food and litter they’re happy

i’ve got bugger all and i’m just waiting for some sort of help the police have left a message but i don’t think there’s anything the police can do apart from really make things worse by coming around and knocking on doors of people saying have you threatened him and they’ll say no i can’t see how their involvement make things any better what i need is waltham forest council to actually do what they said they were going to do in the air and keep the stairwells clear and get the fire doors made safe there’s doors i’m not i can’t check all the doors but from what i’ve seen there’s at least two doors with no um sealed to the base of them and at least one that i know of where they’ve taken the door return off so you can hold the door open which is perfect for a fire am i the only one that remembers grenfell tower

i mean the only reason i had it i’ve got any action out the council my housing officer in the first place is because i reported him to the fire brigade

and that’s the only reason even though three weeks ago this housing officer went around on a s an estate inspection and he pointed out to me all the stuff in the staircase and it wasn’t until i reported him to the fire brigade that he wrote a letter saying he has received complaints well duh it’s not a genius to work at who’s complained if i’m the only one without stuff outside their bloody fire door

thoughtless the chief executive ball from forest council not done a thing all the directors nothing michelle maloney’s pa was the one that wrote to me saying we’ve received all your emails mr gibbons well why didn’t you reply to me three days ago knowing that i’ve got autism and all i want is an acknowledgement that someone’s received it and he’s doing something

no matter how many times i tell people they just ignore me i get a name for being a troublemaker and yet all i do is tell people what’s wrong

and yet that used to be a good thing when i was you know young and yet i have to keep repeating or complaining escalating reports i shouldn’t have to do that i’ve told my housing officer about the state of the bin lockers the doors are broken the hinges are broken the chains are broken i’ve towed him for months now he’s done nothing what’s he gonna take one of the things to come off or you know some dead person to be found in one of them or maybe someone shoots drugs in because that’s what they’re using them for around here the bin lockers aren’t secure and they’re doing their drug deals in the bin lockers the police know the council know nothing’s done so

it’s gone on long enough

it’d be a nice day today as well if only i could get outside and actually go for a walk and get some air in me lungs but no thanks to the council

i mean hopefully ian duncan smith will respond to my emails eventually because i’ve written to him directly a few times but i know it can take him a fortnight to actually respond but i’m hoping that someone in his office will read the emails and see it as urgent and actually do something about so i don’t know

i’m tired because i’m not sleeping because i’m not resting because i’m worried about the fire situation and the neighbor situation

i mean i used to just worry about my security which is why i got a camera up on the door because i’d keep the bottom two doors open now it’s security fire and my actually personal well-being

what more does it take

i don’t know anyway i’ll leave it there for now i think i’ll put this on facebook in a moment

and see if that gets any reaction because at the moment i don’t know what to do i’ve tried ringing up you know autism charities and people regarding spurges and people referred me to the local covid19 support group but i’m not worried about covered 19. this isn’t about the virus this is what people aren’t getting this is what my counselor doesn’t get i’m not worried about the virus i don’t go out most of the time anyway so i’m at least risk of catching it because i’m locked indoors 95 of the time anyway now i can’t get out and try and get some

groceries and even if i do go out there’s hardly any groceries there to get so

no one thinks of people like me apparently healthy single mouths single parents oh fine they’ll bend over backwards for which seems ironic considering you know

i didn’t make myself this way and yet single parents chose to be single parents i know society don’t like me saying stuff like this but if i could choose not to be this way i would if you could choose not to be a single parent i make sure you don’t get pregnant if you’re not married or in a long relationship so that society doesn’t go down the pan like it currently is then you should choose to

mike [ __ ] from lbc had it right a long time ago 15 20 years ago when he was alive on all lbc uh pulled me like asleep he actually said that people should be licensed to have babies they should be sterilized from birth and you should prove that you’re capable and competent to become a parent and i actually agree with that if it was possible i think that would be perfect make everyone sterile and then you would have to want to get pregnant and that would sort an awful lot of problems out if you didn’t pass a parental test and you weren’t in a relationship then you don’t get pregnant we’d soon see the birth rate fall and the overpopulation fall i’m talking not just this country it would have to be global no one should have children unless they’re competent at looking after them most people can’t even look after themselves children is just as an inconvenience and they normally tell to bugger off and come back when it’s dinner time which round here in my area it’s not that bad the kids are pretty good around it but in some areas when they take the burger off they bugger off miles they’re nowhere near home there’s no adult supervision

i don’t know society

it’s the third end of the wedge and now the whole country’s been virtually nationalized i do think it would be better if they did take ownership of the businesses rather than giving them the money do what they did with the banks and you know take shares in the businesses so that they can recoup the money when the businesses are up and running so the cup the country doesn’t in fact lose money at the moment boris johnson cracking job he’s doing by the way but he’s basically funding companies but that’s all well and good but there’s got to be a way of getting that money back

so that it doesn’t come directly out of everyone’s pocket

i know he’s supporting but basically if you’ve lost your job then you’re getting universal credit if you luckily enough not lost your job then the government will be paying eight percent in your wages but i’ll guarantee the government things won’t be paying the other 20 you will lose income because the companies will keep that 80 in effect and just give you what what the government gives them so they’re getting staff wage free for three months at least which to me sounds like the companies are making money out of this just in my head because that’s normally what happens if the government gives people x y and zed

and they hope that the other bit will be paid by the companies it’s very seldom paid by the companies if the government is paying 80 percent of your staff’s wages and you’ve got some excuse not to pay them at all well here’s the 80 the government’s giving you but we can’t give you the other 20

didn’t david cameron once say or was it nick clegg we’re all in this together we’ve been all in it together for 10 years now first we had offstary now we’ve got covid19 which probably means we’ve got another 10 or 20 years of austerity because it’s just a good excuse to carry on

i think finally people have realized or they’re about to realize

that the economy of the planet is not good for it

greed and wealth takes priority all the time there’s not many governments out there that have put any restrictions on people buying things or spending money or holding money or storing goods or holding or doing anything that is in my terms anti-social

no it’s all

let the market take control and as we’ve seen in the last week if you don’t stop people not tell people if you don’t stop people doing things or you don’t have enough people enforcing the rules then people will try to get away with whatever they can which means 10 years ago when the police fall was cut by over 21 000 that’s when people started getting away with more because there was less people to enforce it the poor coppers i feel so sorry for them especially in this area there is so much going wrong and they’re expected to handle everything

very odd we’ll cut you down but we’ll make you do more and they just carry on regardless you know as little as they’re reduced down to they just carry on doing what they can and it’s not fair on the coppers it’s not fair on the nhs it’s not fair on the fire brigade

they’re trying to you know help us when we’ve been self-centered and stupid basically that’s what it all comes down to

and if you’re not looking after your own things if you’re not looking after your own health if you’re not looking after your own security

then society has a problem because you’re putting that burden on someone else like children how many times have we all heard people saying well teachers should be doing this teachers should be doing that hello parenting starts with the parents teachers can carry on teaching your kids especially about behavior and that but if you’re not teaching them at home there’s no way they’re going to carry that one at school you know if they’re not being told this is not how you talk to people they’re going to talk to people wrong and if a teacher tells them they’ll just turn around and say you’re not my parent

society has got the wrong attitude i’ve been saying it for years and no one’s listened and finally something has made people stop and think not everyone give it a few days when eventually boris johnson will have to pull out the stops call in the military in false curfews that’s the only thing that’s gonna happen the only problem i’ve got with curfews is to do that i think what they’re gonna have to do is some sort of rationing with supermarket well some sort of rationing full stop because it’s okay having a curfew but people have to get groceries and in order to get groceries people have to be restricted in what they can buy

and then the shops will have stuff in because i can’t even get a thin bleach i’ve not been able to buy pasta for nearly two weeks now

and there’s no bleach or cleaning products thankfully i’ve got lots of soap because i’ve been stockpiling soap over the last two years i discovered when i cleaned my bathroom out the other day about three weeks ago i found four sachets of liquid soap well it’s only me here and that will last me quite a while

um so we need rationing we need curfews even to the extent that almost like the french system for traffic around the paris center where it was on days and eight or some days odd number plates would go in and some days even number plates would go in they need to

put a curfew in

but allow i don’t know how they’ll do it but they’re gonna have to do it on

well not addresses they need to make it more random but they’re gonna need to change curfew non-curfew hours for all groups so only 10 of the population for instance can go out for this one hour and then after that you have to be indoors and then another 10 can go out the next hour so over five six hours you get everyone having a chance to go into the supermarkets and if you thin it out to that extent and i would ban all car traffic for non-essential travels not just ask people any cars seen on the road without a key worker in them going to a place of work so two nurses going to hospital to work fine but if you live local to where you’re working and you’re still working then walk if you don’t live local and you can’t walk that far

then you work from home and if you can’t work from home your employer has to do something so that you’re not forced to actually take up space on the road there has to be a way most people can work remotely most jobs are rt based now it’s only really people in services well people in retail people in services like fire ambulance hospitals doctors they need to get to work and there should be some sort of there should be some way of doing it we shouldn’t need public transport for key workers if they’ve got their own vehicles then they should be encouraged to use their own vehicles because then they’re not using buses and i can understand i fully support cutting the buses in london down to saudi working and saturday working monday to friday and sunday working saturday and sunday i think it is which is fine because it should only be key workers

but i really do think there should be some sort of curfew some sort of limitations like they’ve got in italy where you’re only allowed one person in a supermarket at a time or one person every two minutes there shouldn’t be any gossiping or chatting on that you go in do your shopping come out

so i don’t know there needs to be more restrictions because people won’t do what they’re told we had pictures of epping forest this morning on facebook and people okay cycling around but then sitting down having teas and coffees outside of the little calf technically it’s not in breach of this restrictions that have been put in place because it hasn’t got any seating inside the calf but when you’ve got a calf in a park and it’s just like a stall and you’ve got a whole bunch of benches outside surely that’s not the spirit of what’s been asked

take the seats away make sure that people disperse after they’ve got their stuff i’m not saying don’t open these stools up or don’t open these gaps up but it should all be take away and it should all be social distancing pictures of people you know 15 people sitting around a couple of benches having teas and coffees and sandwiches that’s not social distancing and that’s not good for society so whoever is running that calf needs to be closed down that’s how strict i would do it if you’re not following the instructions and you’re not encouraging social distancing if you’re a business you get closed no sort of like postponement you get your license taken away you get your business taken away it needs to come to that level people will not do they will do what they can to get around the rules

and like i said businesses need to stay open where they can if take away is allowed then they should encourage people to take it away not take it one foot away and stand next to them having a chat with their friend that’s not takeaway in my book that’s an open air restaurant and that should be shut down

otherwise the restaurants will be doing it they’ll start putting seats in that outside restaurants and saying we’re open because we’re not this is take out

people will bypass the law bypass restrictions wherever possible and all it means is the police have got more work to do they’ve got enough to do as it is so help the police don’t try and find work around don’t bypass the system don’t back

society you need to do your bit to help everyone not to do what you want and see if anyone does anything about it which is what most people are doing which is why i’m ill because society doesn’t do what it’s expected to do it does what it’s told to do and only if someone physically tells them in front of them not on tv or radio or a newspaper or a poster

only if someone in a dark blue uniform walks up to them and say you can’t do that then oh i’m sorry officer didn’t know that lies they knew they’re doing things wrong that calf inepping if that picture is true

they know they’re not supposed to be encouraging social distancing or social groups and encouraging social distancing but they don’t care because they’re going to make a little bit more money today than they did if they closed so they’re encouraging people to spread the virus don’t get me wrong i am not panicking about it but like i said i don’t go out very often i don’t interact i don’t have friends i don’t have family i don’t get any visitors and i try to not interact with people in the street because i’ve got anxiety issues so that’s a win-win for me because it keeps people off the streets mostly when i can get past my neighbors

i don’t know

people i just bad they want free parking because there’s a virus they want to be able to do anything because there’s a virus they want you know i’ve even seen people say why isn’t public transport free now well if you’re not supposed to be traveling why do you want free public transport why do you want free parking

if all week the prime minister has been going on about social distancing distancing measures if you can work for do does anyone remember if you can work from home work from home i would say 85 of these these people can work from home but they just want to go in because they want to have a little chat with fred or john or sue

hello social distancing work from home self-isolation there goes merlin

they’re all having to go because they’ve got new clean litter for the first time in about five days so they’re all happy now oh i don’t know right i’m going to end this now because i’ve been going on far too long what’s it about 40 minutes now i think

well good luck if you make it to the end like i say in a few months time this will be up on youtube when i’ve got around to editing all the other videos i’ve got but i might just post this if this is you know capable of getting out there on facebook at least people on facebook will realize what me and people like me are going through i mean this is hell for people with anxiety because even if they do go out they’ve got crowds everywhere in the supermarkets so it’s not exactly fun time for people with anxiety or spurges autism so my i do feel for you people you fellow sufferers my situation just made worse by waltham forest council not doing things correctly and my neighbor has been selfish

i mean it doesn’t really help that i mean a block of one-bedroom flats and i’m surrounded by single parents well in fact they’re claiming to be single parents and they’re not even single parents because there’s couples and children living in every flat

apart from i think the two the two downstairs on the ground floor everyone else’s children in their flats

which is weird considering it’s a couple and children and a few of them are new tenants only gone in the last couple of years since i’ve been here so how does that work two adults and at least a child in a flat and then new into that flat i wonder why my life’s a hell anyway i’m sorry to be going on hopefully the microphones picked the sound up and um i’ll see you on youtube